5.20.2004

Strange sightings from today's lunch hour:

1. Guy sitting atop a large boulder, in the middle of his office park lawn, talking on his cellphone.

2. Dead porcupine on the curb, as if he was about to cross the street, then laid down and died.

3. Two crows chasing a smallish red hawk across the sky over I-95, as if away from their nest.

4. In the checkout line at Target, a very well-behaved little boy (unusual enough by itself) "helping" his mom by carrying a rolled up bath mat on his head.

5. On Rt. 3 at my exit, the ultimate Bad Camry Driving moment: a green Camry I'd been following for a while somehow misinterpreted the signs for the exit, peeled right about 50 yards ahead of the offramp into the construction area (they've been widening Rt. 3 for like 18 months), drove BEHIND a line of Jersey barriers and then rejoined the offramp. There was fresh asphalt over there, but there are big orange pylons and it's pretty clear that the lane is not yet in use -- he's lucky he didn't swerve off into the woods or the big ditch on the righthand side, seeing as there's no guardrail yet. I gave him a look as I pulled up next to him at the bottom of the ramp, and he appeared -- in classic Camry driver fashion -- blissfully unaware.

1 comment:

Nathaniel Woodward said...

So many bad Camry stories, they could fill their own blog! In Other Dumb Idiots News--

Earlier this week, I was at a red light on Main Street in Waltham. On the opposite side of the intersection, a group of 6 teenage girls (maybe freshmen) were standing on the corner. The *moment* the light turned green, the first girl started across the crosswalk, headed across my lane. I stomped on the brakes. Now I'm sitting directly in the middle of the intersection, and the girl has stopped two steps from the curb. All the other girls are on the curb. I give her a full 2 seconds. She stares at me and she doesn't move. I then lift off the brake and she simultaneously starts crossing in front of me again. I stomp on the brake again. This time, I lift my arms up and say *cross already!* (the sunroof was open so she heard me.) At this point the lead idiot and her gang all cross, giggling. One of them says "sorry", lamely. I then stomp on the gas, crushing the slowest girl under my tires. I cackle maniacally as I drive off.