And as part of my ongoing republication of Salon.com content, I have to post this piece of Cary Tennis' advice column from today...it seems like something from good ol' Kirk Israel and his Blender of Love...

Q: If one were to decide to eschew any further attempts to have romance, relationship, sex, etc., what would be some good alternative hobbies/activities to take the place of the aforementioned for the rest of one's life?

A: Unfortunately, there are no perfect alternatives to romance. Like romance, they are all but painful reminders of our human imperfection. "Monopoly" begins to repeat after 10 years or so. Playing the market ages you. The horses drive you mad. Gardening is too solitary. Hang-gliding makes you giddy. With rock climbing, the insurance will kill you. Philately is for dilettantes. Art collecting is for the rich. Writing ruins your skin. Surfing is seasonal and the injuries are severe. Travel is broadening but will bankrupt you too. Poetry makes your teeth go bad. Drinking works only short-term; the booze will take your wallet in the middle of the night just like a bad hooker. You could be a decorator, but you'd have to change your phone number. Dogs are fun but their politics are suspect; they're all closet totalitarians. Mice are fine for men but bad for women; they make women jump on tables. Snakes are only for shirtless adolescents. Photography will keep you awake in the darkroom. Lepidopterology was good for Nabokov but he was one of a kind. Cooking will sustain you but you'll get fat. Politics will break your heart. Religion is only for the pure and the criminally insane.

I could go on, but you get the picture: You might as well fall in love.