"Thou must don puffy sleeves before thou canst breach the rope and challenge yon band of scrappy beekeepers." -- Badass blogger Bad News Hughes goes to . . . a renaissance faire! In Florida! With his digital camera! Don't say I never do anything fun around here.

“'Does this look familiar?' Detective Doe asked, pointing dramatically at a cardboard box on the table which held the remnants of my meatball." -- Who knew Whole Foods was a police state? This blogger was banned from an NYC WF for life because she grazed on a soy meatball. Harsh!

On a related note, I believe this afternoon I discovered the Ultimate 3:30 Snack -- half a 2.25 oz. bag of these plus about 1/4 c. of this. I felt so virtuous taking my p.b. out of the refrigerator too, instead of hoovering a sleeve of overpriced M&M's from the vending machine, right next to the fridge. My pancreas thanked me.

Here Comes The Restraining Order -- My favorite on this page of "kooky" wedding cake toppers, the Now I Have You model. A hilarious start to your long and blissful life together! See also the Ethnic Oh No You Don't; presumably "ethnicity" here is synonymous with "melanin."

"A bee flew in my car and attacked me and I had to pull over." -- Top ten "unusual" excuses for arriving late to work...better file these away...

Odd British kids' cartoons -- OK, maybe no odder than Get Fuzzy, but definitely odd.